Santa Banta are here!

Santa: Oye tera vyah ho gya?
Banta: Haan.
Santa: Kuri naal?
Banta: Oye munde naal v hunda hai kya?
Santa: Haan... Meri bhain da hoya si !
Daku Mangal Singh Banta ke ghar mein ghusa aur bola: Sona kahan hai, jaldi bataao
Banta: Pura ghar khali hai malko, jithe marzi so jao!

Santa to Jeeto: Kaisi sabzi banai hai, bilkul Gobar jaisa swad hai. Jeeto, maatha peet te hue: Hey bhagwan! Na jane inhone kya-kya kha ke dekha hua hai.

A crow shits on a Banta. Preeto gives tissue paper to him.
Banta: Koi phayda nahin, kauwa toh ud gaya !

Banta: Jab main paida hua tha to military walon ne 21 topein chalayeen thi.
Santa: Kamaal hai ! Sab ka nishana chook gaya ?

Santa: Drinking n driving dono nalo naal nai ho sakde.
Banta: Y?
Santa: Je speed breaker aa gaya taa peg dul jau.

Santa bar vich ro reha si.
Bartender: Kyon ro rahe ho?
Santa: Hor ki karan? Main jis kudi da naa bhulna chahunda si usda naam yaad hi nahin aa reha.

Phone ki ring baji.
Santa: Phone mere liye ho to kehna mein ghar pe nahin hoon.
Jeeto phone pe: Wo ghar pe hain.
Santa: Maine mana kiya tha...
Jeeto: Phone mere liye tha!

Santa to a doc: Apne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai, uska haath lagtey hi mein theek ho gaya .
Doc: Jaanta hoon, thappad ki awaaz mujhe bhi sunai di thi.

Santa was writing the passive voice of 'I made a mistake.'
He wrote: I was made by a mistake.

Santa to Banta: Main apna purse ghar bhool aaya, mainu 1000 Rs chahide si.
Banta: Dost hi dost de kam aunda hai, le 10 Rs, riksha kar te purse le aa.

An ATM's jammed & failed when operated by Santa.
Why? B'coz he put a pin from his turban when asked: Enter ur Pin

Banta: Wo ladki deaf lagti hai. Main kuch kehta hoon, woh kuch aur hi bolti hai.
Santa: Kaise?
Banta: Maine kaha I Luv U, to woh boli ' Maine kal hi Naye Sandal kharide hain'